My Life with Boys, Ottawa Family Photographer
I'm often told that having only boys means that “I’ll always be the princess”. I’m not sure what it’s like to be a princess, but I’m pretty sure this isn’t it.
My house is a mess. No, that’s not right. It’s not messy - it’s destroyed. The walls are coloured, banged up and bruised. Our door stop springs have no rubber stubs, there is always sand at the bottom of the tub, and the couch cushions are never actually on the couch.
The television constantly has grubby fingerprints on it – and a few blobs of yogurt – the remote control is always missing, and watching tv is never a sit-down activity. Let’s be honest, is anything ever a sit-down activity?
Their clothes are always stained, torn or just plain missing.
They only wear shoes that make them run “super fast”, and they will test them out in the store, just to be sure.
They never care if there is ketchup spread across their face or mold growing behind their ears; the dirtier, the better.
And for kids who like to stick their tongues out as much as they do, you'd think they'd enjoy brushing their teeth.
Every activity is a contact sport. You can find at least 3 bruises on their body at any given time and they will have no memory of how they got there.
Bandaids are a joke; nothing sticks to skin that perpetually dirty.
Every chair, stair or counter is a jungle gym or some building they need to scale to save the world from evil forces.
Everything is a competition and someone always ends up in tears.
They are attracted to all things violent and dangerous. It’s a miracle that CHEO doesn’t have assigned seating for us.
The No-Pants Party
They have something against pants and clothing in general. My #peniseseverywhere hashtag is legit, y’all.
They are obsessed with their boy bits and if they spent as much time reading as they do playing with those bits, they’d be freakin' geniuses.
They need a constant reminder that it’s not appropriate to pee off the back step at home. I blame their father.
What I Know
Now, to be fair, I have never raised a girl. But I am a girl and grew up with another girl and I can say that this was not what our house looked like and we did not have each other in a headlock at least a couple times a day. It is certainly possible that these experiences are not specific to boys, but all I know is that they are to MY boys and I’m sure there are fellow mamas of boys like mine out there who can relate...and sympathize.
I Do Still Love Them
BUT, and it's a BIG but....
They are amazing little people and I did willingly create this army – or circus, depending on how you look at it. My monkeys would undoubtedly sell out the show on a daily basis.
They do still find time in their war path to snuggle… and OH, those snuggles are pure gold. They make all the demolition and dirt worthwhile.
I suppose I do feel like I'm getting a royal treatment at times, and hopefully I'll always be THEIR princess. xoxo